So, you know when you have self realizations/epiphanies that cause you to hit a wall?
That's about where I'm at right now.
I was flipping through my old tweets last night (since I've been unable to fall asleep the past few days) and I stumbled upon a bitterish sounding tweet from December. I kind of don't want to go into ANY detail about it, but basically I turned down something I had wanted for... probably a year then, but wasn't consciously thinking about it/was blinded. And I sat there, realized what I had done,
and cried a little.
Y'know, if I had chosen to go for it then (instead of MUCH LATER AUGH), I'm pretty sure when I got my unofficial transcript yesterday, I wouldn't have been so angry and upset at myself. It would have COMPLETELY OVERHAULED my second year winter semester. I mean, I would have been so different.
And I turned it down. Obviously I'm not worried because I made that decision later on this year (which is now affecting my Fall semester like mad), but I just can't believe how stupid I was.
I'm usually not one for regrets (I don't regret most of second semester, regardless how IDIOTIC I was during that time), and I'm not one to really want to change the past, since it's made me into me. But I honestly believe I would be in a better state mentally (and maybe even physically?) if I had just said yes (in a sense).
Anyway, I'm boring regardless. I basically studied, cooked a roast, froze the leftovers, and studied more. OH WAIT, I got a haircut. -insert weak monotone cheering here-
Oh, and I guess I'm extremely sore from Cabaret class. We started doing our choreography (oh, I know: LANIE LEARNED A DANCE?) to Mya's "My Love is Like Whoa."I'm not sure if my Mom would want to see some of the dance moves. Curious? Youtube 'Simplicity... and Five Chairs' and imagine it much slower, and to said song above.
Well, time to actually get some sleep. :)
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